Wednesday, December 31, 2008


How is it that a two-year old can say "frustrating",
but not his own name?

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

The early-morning mid-cartoon nap, brought to you by Disney-Pixar's Wall-E

I don't usually mind this whole "getting up before the sun" thing,
but I have the sneaking suspicion that
I'm missing the best part.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

The festive pictorial

Festivities kicked off last night with the annual pj party:

Daddy and Jaxon

Hugh Heffner Mommy and Jaxon

And this morning, Jaxon was uncerimoniously yanked out of bed and made to open presents, it was only with the promise of Hot Chocolate that he agreed to this arrangement in the first place.

Sorry so dark. Again, I don't have professional equipment. Just a Kodak camera.

Jaxon manned up to the task ahead and it didn't take him long to take his job seriously.

Even Hendrix got to join in the fun (look at him sitting down like a good boy!)

Merry Christmas from the Ruiz Family!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

A Visit From St. Nicholas

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through our house
There was much stirring, especially jumping on the couch;
The stockings, nonexistent, the tree stuffed to the gills,
Saw Daddy assembling toys in the back and Mommy searching for pills;
Jaxon, hyped up on sugar, refused to sleep in his own bed,
He preferred to stay up, playing in Hendrix's cage instead;
When Mommy and Daddy finally wrestled him in,
The hour was late, the chance of sleep, slim.
Then out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
Daddy sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the kitchen he flew like a flash,
hitting the counter on his way out and making a big crash.
The moon, hardly visible through the falling rain,
Gave him just enough light draw his gun and take aim
When, what to his wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,
With a old little driver, so lively and quick,
Daddy wondered for a moment "How isn't he airsick?"
More quickly than Hendrix his tame reindeer came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donner and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"
As dirt that before the wild dust devil flies,
Those reindeer, they shot through the evening sky,
So up to our rooftop the whole group flew,
With the sleigh full of stuff, and the little old man, too.
And then, in a twinkling, we heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
Alarmed, Daddy rushed back in and let out the hound,
While through the back door St. Nicholas came with a bound.
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.
His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow;
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And Daddy laughed when he saw him, in spite of himself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave Dad to know we had nothing to dread;
He spoke not a word, but gave Hendrix's head a small pat,
Then emptied his gifts under the tree and said "That's that"
Then laying his finger aside of his nose,
He went back outside and to the rooftop he rose;
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But we heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Happy 5th Birthday!

Dear Landon,
Oh my, has it really been 5 years, buddy? Auntie can hardly believe how quickly the time has gone by, or how much you've grown--from itty bitty baby to big boy. I can't believe that you're in Preschool now and will start kindergarten next year!

What can I say about my LannyPoo? You're one smart dude, and you have a fantastic sense of humor. You can put a smile on any one's face, and keep us all laughing. You're an awesome big brother, you can always be counted on to watch out for your brother, sister and even your cousin. You have a big imagination, and have kept us guessing with stories about "Gokie" and your horse, Ike (I especially loved when he got a watch)--and more recently with "Octopus Prime" and "Megazords". I hope Auntie got all that right.

You're a special boy, Landon Russel, and we all love you very much. We can't wait to see what new adventures you will go on, and what new things you will learn! We're all so very blessed to have you a part of our family.

Happy Birthday, Landy--we can't wait to celebrate!

Your Auntie Heather

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

If I were Snow White...

...I would call this one "Needy"


A quick Jaxon anecdote to tickle the funny bone first thing this chilly morning.

Last night, while ushering Jaxon to the back for bed (late, might I add--Jaxon managed to stay quiet enough that neither his father or I noticed the time slowly slipping into the 9 o'clock hour--we were mailing out our Christmas cards, letters and pictures try not to get too excited) we made a pit stop in the bathroom so I could wash his hands and face and brush his teeth. While I waited for the water to warm up, I put some paste on his toothbrush and set it aside. I busied myself with wetting down a washcloth when I became aware that Jaxon was standing on the very tippy-top of his tip-toes, trying to get a hold of the toothbrush.

The conversation went like this:
H: Hang on buddy, lets wash your face and manos [hands] first.
J: Ungghhh... unnngh (reaching)
(Jaxon rocks back onto the balls of his feet and looks up at me, then stands on his tip-toes again and slaps futilely at the counter top just short of the toothbrush. He fixes me with another stare and steps back)
J: Short, mom.

According to Mirriam-Webster:
Short \ˈshȯrt\ adjective:
1 a having little length; b not tall or high [Jaxon cannot reach his toothbrush, therefore Jaxon is short]
2 seeming to pass quickly [Jaxon has made great progress in just a few short years]

Monday, December 15, 2008

Happy Birthday, JoJo!

Dear Joyce,
Wow, a whole year and some change has passed since we left Las Vegas--and we miss you more every day!
I still remember the first time you and I really talked in Cottonwood... and our conversation went something like:
"Hey Joyce, I'm gonna go to lunch and Gloria said you would take the phones for me?"
"I'm kidding, go to lunch"

Soon, a friendship blossomed, and I began to understand that Joyce humor. :)
I thank the Lord every day for my Joyce, you've been there for me and my family through thick and thin (more "thick" than thin these days *wink*), good times and bad. You are more than a friend, you're family--and we're proud to call you that.
You're a selfless person, always giving to others at your own expense. You have raised a wonderful boy and are always around to help me raise mine. I always know I can count on my JoJo for a bit of advice. You have such an amazing strength that you manage to share with everyone around you.
You were there the day my our (just don't tell Preston) son was born, and loved him the very instant you laid eyes on him (probably before), and were by my side to see so many of his firsts. You've been a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear to vent to, and someone to hug when I needed it. I hope you know how very much you are loved by not only me, but Preston and especially Jaxon--who still points out his JoJo in pictures and sends you kisses, no matter how long its been since he last saw you, and I hope you know that you're my hero.

Happy Birthday, JoJo!

P.S.--Preston says we'll be there for a visit soon!

Sunday, December 14, 2008

2008 Polar Fest, the pictorial

The blurry thing on top of the other blurry thing is my son. I think.

I don't know, but I'm starting up a collection for a Nikon.

Preston would like to refer to these as the "Teacups of Doom".
He's hardcore like that.

They pulled, like, 5 Gs on that slide, and the rat pelt blanket they were seated upon disintegrated when it got sucked into a black hole.

Jaxon is greeting the bunny thusly:

"Hey bunny, bunny hey. Hi bunny wabbit!"

And this conversation went like:
"Hey, hey chicken. Hey chicken, hey! Hey chicken."

And this one was all:

"Hey donkey, hey donkey, hey, hey donkey!"

...and then the Donkey ran away with his ears bleeding
You can see how that worked out for him, since he was caged in.
Jaxon is merciless.

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Photo Shoot

Hendrix aspires to be a supermodel someday...

Preston supplied the stickers, and hilarity ensued.

Jam Sessions

Congratulations, you are about to experience the

world premiere

of Jaxon's very first recorded jam session.

Yes, the featured track was written and performed by that musical prodigy...

My son.

We call his first hit "It ain't easy bein' two"

Friday, December 12, 2008

Those Northern-dwelling folk

We had some visitors this week, my sister--Aunt Tara, Uncle Will, and cousins Landon, Tristan and Avery all came out for a short visit. The kids had a blast playing together, the men worked, and us ladies had a great time catching up on gossip and exchanging anecdotes about raising our children.
Despite a hairy trip to IKEA, which I think cost Tara, Jenny and myself each several years of therapy, we were sad to see them head back home--but hope to see everyone again soon.

Breaking in Tara and Will's new air mattress

An ornament bandit caught in the act

Much giggling was heard

Sunday, December 7, 2008

A quick weekend recap, in pictures

The boys had fun all weekend playing with Preston's birthday present--recording software. I hope to have a song or two to share soon.

Hendrix ate a stick, wedged it across the roof of his mouth and had to go to the Vet to have it removed. He also discovered apples.

Jenny came over to hang out, sporting this.

And Jaxon and Hendrix have something new to torment me with.


Thursday, December 4, 2008

The Sleep Chronicles, chapter 156

Chapters 1-155 of The Sleep Chronicles have unfortunately been lost. I say unfortunately because they were freakin' entertaining. Actually, chapter 155 can be found here and chapter 154 can be found here.

Night melted into morning sometime around 4 AM, which probably doesn't make sense... but hello, you're reading my blog here. Let's not get all nit-picky.
Four. AM. And Jaxon's sweet voice pierces the cold morning air.


If you have children and can read phonetically, you know that this is the yell of doom, and by doom, I mean you're not getting any more sleep today.
So I drag my carcass corpse out of bed and (I'm sorry... I don't like the word carcass... the last three letters... so inappropriate) check on my darling, darling son--who is, also inappropriately, all bright-eyed and bushy tailed. Did I mention its 4 AM? And cold?

Let's address this cold for a moment. It has officially dropped into the 40's at night (and those of you that don't live in Arizona and are all tough, hush), and it's COLD, and my husband refuses to turn on the heat. Instead, we resort to dressing Jaxon in footie pajamas (which, if I had the time, I would rant about how adorable these footie pajamas are on a still-diapered two-year-old--imagine, his diaper bum is the biggest lump in these sausage casing-like pajamas, so cute) and wearing socks and huddling under blankets. Husband shall be henceforth known as "the miser".

Sorry, I had to read back to figure out where I was in the story because this is a Heather story and we get lost in details... I bring the kid back to my bed which is such a bad idea but I'm absolutely dying of exhaustion at this point in my life and please kid don't you want to sleep in a little bit more?

How does my son thank me for my hospitality? He rolls over on my head and tries to suffocate me for the thought, and if that weren't enough--I can't even sufficiently worry about my own safety or my son's apparently homicidal tendencies because while he's in the process of suffocating me with his adorable footie pajamas, he's also precariously dangling his two-year-old body over the edge of the bed. In retrospect, the three-foot drop probably wouldn't have done anything to him and I should have let the ungrateful little wretch fall. After an hour of similar entertainment, I suggest to the miser that perhaps our little bundle of joy is tired again, and would like to return to his own room, so off the miser and the grouch go... and I almost nod off in the 20 seconds of peace that follow.

"Hungry! Hungry!" and I inappropriately think "Hippos" at this point. There's an awful lot of inappropriateness going on in this house this morning.

And we're all up and running at a few minutes' after 5, our breath clouding the morning air until I declare that the oven hasn't been cleaned in ages, and it must be done. NOW. Ah, warmth, sweet warmth. My house smells of burnt toast, but the miser doesn't suspect a thing. Ovens. Because Arizonans don't have fireplaces.

Meanwhile, the miser sets Jaxon up in his chair with a cup of chocolate milk, then a nutri-grain bar, banana and cereal--which I probably don't have to point out, is such a rookie mistake that it isn't even funny. And here I am, two-and-a-half hours later, staring at that same nutri-grain bar, banana and cereal that remain untouched--a testament to my son's wasteful nature. I believe he's also a corporate lobbyist for big oil and is pulling for global warming. The chocolate milk is long-gone.

I got an early start on my entry, and after Jaxon finished his breakfast of nutritious sugar milk, he invoked the right to "snuggle buggle", that is, um... Jaxonspeak for snuggling, and got blissfully quiet for the first time since 4. When I finally thought to look down a few minutes later, I realized...

that he was asleep.

I unceremoniously dumped him on the couch and went in search of a pillow and blanket, harvested without much difficulty from Jaxon's land of no return, aka the crib. I returned and made a camp bed on the couch, deposited one (1) two-year-old, flipped on the tube to "Jack's Big Music Show", and took the picture below to share with the miser (who snuck away to head to the office soon after breakfast) before settling back in for some work. Just when I thought Jaxon had conked out again, the remote slid from the arm of the couch and landed near his head. That's when I hear...

"Stoopid wee-mote."

Mental Health: Quickly slipping into hysteria

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Happy 26th!

Dear Preston,
Let's see, I've now known you over 8 years, and we've been married over 6 of those years... which, if my math is correct, is like half of your lifetime. Or something like that.
Actually, the time has flown--it seems like just yesterday we were sitting in Accounting class, passing notes back and forth, not working hard, and playing pool in our "off time". You were the guy I admired from afar (mostly because I was, ahem, dating somebody else), but as somebody else at another time once said... some things are just meant to be. And here we are, all grown up and playing house and we have a little boy and we're supposed to be adults (don't worry, I won't tell anybody that we totally aren't).
We've been through a lot, especially in the last few years, but we've always been able to pull together and get through it. You're a great strength to me, but more importantly--to our son. You're a wonderful father, and I love watching you and Jaxon doing "boy stuff" together. I love that you have so much patience with him (yes, even when he's throwing one of his "jumpy tantrums"), and I know I can always count on you to walk with him in the restaurant or... say, Pearl Harbor, or a crowded airplane, when things get hairy. I love that you make time for him at the end of a busy day. Even on school nights when he's fast asleep hours before you get home, you always go in and check on him and say a few words to him in his sleep before heading to bed yourself. You've nurtured his love for music and tools--important things for a little boy, and you've supported that, sometimes, he just wants to carry his baby doll around for a while.
You manage all this while holding down a beyond-full-time job with a monstrous commute and a rigorous school schedule... not to mention the help I get around the house, especially on the weekends (when you even let me sleep in!) when you could be doing homework. You let me stay home with our baby, even though it would be easier financially if I had an outside job. I don't thank you enough for what you do.
Happy Birthday, babe. May there be many, many more to follow... because your son loves cake.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Bad to the bone

Thanks to Aunt Ness and Uncle Bryan, Jaxon is officially owns the
coolest worm in the whole neighborhood.

Try not to be jealous

...but I got to spend my weekend with this little boy.
Oh, and the mohawk? Totally natural.
Auntie is in love.