Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Hearty Breakfast Shake

1 banana, frozen
1 tsp. unsweetened cocoa powder
1/2 cup raw oats (uncooked)
Milk, soy, almond milk... Whatever is your dairy-type drink of choice.

Toss banana, cocoa and oats into a blender, add enough milk to cover ingredients (I guesstimate a cup or so). Blend until smooth.

If you consume protein powder, this is an excellent way to incorporate it into your breakfast. Easy to take on the go, the oatmeal will keep you full for hours. You can also add a few almonds or a bit of peanut butter if you'd like some extra protein, but keep an eye on the portion-size.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Prime Location Domination in a Group Setting

I have identified two basic strategies for scavenging someone else's spot in a group setting such as Zumba.

Situation one: Scavenger arrives to class late, and finds themselves relegated to the back. This requires the employment of the bulldozer, or pillaging, strategy. Scavenger uses obnoxiously large and often unrefined arm and leg movements. Then, taking advantage of his/her fellow classmate's unwillingness to risk life or limb to hold their spot, the Scavenger effectively clears the way to a more desirable spot, often 3-4 rows forward and 5-7 spots left or right.
Situation two: Scavenger finds themselves within sniffing distance of their target location. This situation requires the use of the vulture tactic. Scavenger waits until thirst or another malady weakens their target enough to make him/her leave just long enough for the Scavenger to swoop in and take over. This technique works well for that prime spot just one or two clicks over.

Nobody wants to be the victim of a Scavenger, so here's what you can do to protect yourself. First, you will need to practice self-denial. You need a drink? Use the bathroom? Toughen up, cupcake--those vulture-type Scavengers aren't going to take pity on your bodily needs, and neither should you. And to deter the bulldozer, you'll want to employ body armor. Goggles, a helmet, shin pads and steel-toed boots are a good start.

Lastly, don't let the Scavenger make you question your existence. You are visible, and most of us can see you.
Happy workout!

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

When you are a parent... are also a one-person search and rescue operation.

Missing: Two muppets by name of Elmo and Ernie, and it is nap time.

Plan: Check bottom two pantry shelves, train table drawers, pool table pockets, low-lying bathroom and kitchen cabinets, and refrigerator.

Outcome: Muppets located safely, nap time commenced on schedule. Crisis averted.